It’s just me, being me

September 4, 2022

Good morning my friends.  I hope you are doing well and enjoying life.  It’s already September and Labor Day weekend.  I suppose this marks the end of summer, especially for kids returning to school.  This is the perfect weekend to explore and find something new along your journey of life.  What are you waiting for?  Nothing will ever happen, unless you take the first step to make your dreams become reality.  If its fear holding you back, let that foolishness go.  Fear can be a powerful force, while it influences and dominates your perceptions.  It has the ability to control and constrain your thoughts, movements and actions; but this is only possible if you believe it’s real.  Don’t allow your untrue thoughts to manipulate your life.  I let my fears suppress my emotions and happiness for many years.  I won’t permit fear (or my past) to creep into my life any longer.  I don’t look back, because I control my thoughts and move forward into each new day.  I’m living in the present and working toward a happy and bright future.  At this stage in life, every day is a weekend for me.  Only the weather dictates what season it might be; which has the potential to be just about anything (depending on where I am).  I enjoy moderate temperatures; but I’m happy with what nature provides.  A pleasant atmosphere helps make life perfect and blissful (or as “perfect” as life can be).  I’m truly enjoying this chapter; as each day offers a clean slate to write my life story.  I plan to enjoy living as long as possible; or as long as God allows me to stay on this planet.  I’m still not completely satisfied with “me”, but I’ve finally realized I’m a good person and deserve good things.  I might have a bit more internal work to do, but I’m content and happy with who I am.  I dislike people who use their size or influence to intimidate or bully others.  These individuals have self-esteem issues, are unhappy, negative and who knows what else.  I believe in karma and what goes around comes around.  I don’t wish anyone harm, but unfortunately, there are some disgusting people in this world.  That’s all I’ll say on that subject.

So, how loud do I have to scream before someone hears me?  Is everyone so wrapped up in their own little world that they don’t hear or see anything else happening around them?  You might not know it, but I struggled with “body image” issues from a very young age.  I always wanted to be taller, stronger or better looking, etc.  I just wasn’t happy with the exterior me.  I’m not sure why or what created this problem.  It may have begun in kindergarten, when a couple older kids threatened me and called me names.  Whatever the circumstances were, thus began my odyssey.  The dilemma stuck with me for many years.  As a kid, I was never happy with how I looked or who I was.  Going to Catholic grade school didn’t help with any of these issues or concerns.  The nuns didn’t care how I looked or who I was.  Many of them seemed to be mean or angry individuals.  I won’t attempt to speculate why or what made them this way.  I do know some of them seemed to enjoy corporal punishment.  There were times when it was deserved, but sometimes it wasn’t.  When I transferred to public school, for junior high, I realized the teachers were less interested with control of kids and more with getting to the end of the day.  The kids were the same in private or public school.  Some were nice and some were cruel; it’s that simple.  Junior and senior high weren’t the best of times.  I didn’t like school and dreaded attending, but I was stuck.  When the military draft came (during the Viet Nam War), I wanted to go.  When I received my induction notice in the mail, I was both frightened and happy.  My Mom was horrified.  It was my chance to escape.  Anything to get me away from school and home!  As my luck would have it, Nixon ended the draft, my Mom refused to let me join the military, so I stayed in college.  Attending college in San Diego, and away from home, was a fabulous dream come true.  This is where I came to life, gained real self-confidence and began to actually live.

My struggles, regarding my appearance, continued into adulthood.  My difficulties with communication issues, primarily in relationships, didn’t help either.  It always seemed difficult for me to fully open my heart and soul to others.  My nearly 69 years on earth (including my career and just life), have taught me a variety of valuable lessons, about myself and interactions with others.  Everyone has struggles and issues they deal with; and if they say they don’t or haven’t had any, they aren’t being truthful.  We all struggle from time to time.  I read a social media post, by a friend, the other day.  She was talking about struggles with body image, beginning at an early age.  As I read her story, I could feel the intense conflict and sadness she experienced.  She discussed in detail how the issues continued to follow her until recently; and how she finally resolved them.  While our stories are different; the emotions, turbulence and struggles that were created are similar and very real.  It’s nice knowing we’ve both reached places of harmony and happiness with ourselves.  I’ve heard many stories associated with this; that often lead to physical or mental trauma.  Society, and humans, can be cruel and demanding; often placing appearance (and physical looks) over anything else.  It really is crazy how this process is thrown at kids at an early age.  I can only imagine the pressure and stress woman (and girls) feel, to look or act a certain way; in order to be accepted or considered beautiful.  It’s a sad and sick society we live in.  “Body image” ranges from body type, shape, make-up, hair, skin, clothing and whatever else factors in to physical appearance.  This is worldwide multi-billion-dollar industry.  It’s much like the pharmaceutical industry.  They influence entire populations into believing we need their product in order to feel better, look better or just be “normal.”  It’s all about making money and nothing to do with helping us, as humans.  It’s both comforting and empowering knowing women are rebelling against this nonsense.  Our physical body is nothing more than the carrier for our soul.  This is where the internal magic happens.  My outward appearance is irrelevant, compared to what my mind, heart and soul possess.  This is what makes us each unique and special humans.  If you’re judging me based on appearance, you’re missing the real me. 

As I’ve aged and matured with experience and knowledge, I’ve sat in silence and thought about my existence.  When was the last time you slowed down to contemplate life?  Have you ever taken a moment to consider where you came from, who you are or where you’re going?  Maybe if you pulled your face up from your cell phone screen once in a while, you’d actually witness life happening all around you.  I suppose some people can’t be bothered, or are too busy, to lift their head up a few inches.  That’s just sad.  If you came up for air, now and then, you’d discover this amazing thing called nature.  It’s all around us every day!  So many people take it for granted, (and that it exists), yet never take the time to actually go explore it.  If they did, they would find some amazing things out there.  Sitting in nature has a fabulous calming quality all its own.  Try sitting on the sand at a quiet beach, or walk through a forest of giant trees, or hike in the mountains with tall peaks.  These are the places you will find solace, peace, harmony and happiness.  I discovered; it doesn’t matter how tall or strong I am or what I look.  The only thing that matters, comes down to how I feel about me.  My self-confidence, inner power and my own abilities say it all.  Today is a new day to be a better me; positive, healthy, grateful and happy.  Follow your dreams.  They know the way.

Please tune in and join me again next Sunday for more!  The puzzle of life is always changing.  Change can lead to amazing opportunities.  Together, let’s be healthy and strong; mentally, physically and spiritually! 

Thanks for your love and support!  Embrace Life!  Be sure to get outside and enjoy nature!

Published by lapd22695

My goal is to be a better me. I want people to be more aware about mental and physical health. We are all humans living on this planet. Let's enjoy our lives, happy and healthy. It's okay to smile and help others along the way.

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